I'm just warning ya I'm a wee bit tipsy.... been nursing a bottle of wine while cleaning the kitchen. Today I hid my pain and discomfort well.... I did nothing strenuous but I took my daughter to Montevallo.... I did not cry .. I did not make a scene.... I didn't even linger. I guess when I started buying stuff one year ago in preparation that was my way of coping. I feel like it all might hit me really hard here at some point .... Lanie is all moved in...Dorm room looks good but honestly.. Connie Holaway Hulsey it could use your touch... you are just so creative.... that said we didn't do to bad.... the vehicles were unloaded at 930am and stuff was carried up at 10am, I stayed up stairs and cut tape.... lol..... good excuse right? we had her squared away buy 130p.... we lingered till 215 she had an orientation at 4p, Rick wanted to stay till after 3p but I thought she needed time to wander or just relax.... he was tense but decided we'd go......I hugged her by with last minute safety advice. and we left..... I love my husband but other than once a year on a cruise we haven't really been alone since we dated. I hope this new time in our marriage is or can be like we are dating again. with all this and my mom having health issues as well as 2 aunts and then my new job.... I am feeling anxious and ambivalent .......hence a bottle of wine... late night kitchen cleaning.... also I would like to add........ I knew I would miss those from River City.... but not this much I miss everyone.... the patients..... the coworkers..... I grew so much there .... I so want to go back.... I really really really do.... nothing is ever perfect.... sure i felt forced into my position of resignation..... but i miss it all....... I had time to do nursing.... I run so much and see so little of the patients on the night shift.... they are asleep rightly so.... but still...... Ive waxed on and on..... so many changes in this life.... I must have faith.... if I am suppose to be at River city the lord will humble me and those involved and a door will open..... or life will I don't know.... I just have faith that the next course of action will fall before. I have grown so much this year spiritually. I turn to prayer so freely now.....for others and myself. I get all turned around inside trying to define God or my higher power.... its there..... undefinable and I have faith.... I am open to the next chapter in my life. whatever is in my higher good I am ready..... that said please lord no deaths... and while I'm asking I could do with a few less health issues..... just saying.... your will be done.... but if you're listening .... I had to say..... God bless everyone.....

I'm just warning ya I'm a wee bit tipsy.... been nursing a bottle of wine while cleaning the kitchen. Today I hid my pain and discomfort well.... I did nothing strenuous but I took my daughter to Montevallo.... I did not cry .. I did not make a scene.... I didn't even linger. I guess when I started buying stuff one year ago in preparation that was my way of coping. I feel like it all might hit me really hard here at some point .... Lanie is all moved in...Dorm room looks good but honestly.. Connie Holaway Hulsey it could use your touch... you are just so creative.... that said we didn't do to bad.... the vehicles were unloaded at 930am and stuff was carried up at 10am, I stayed up stairs and cut tape.... lol..... good excuse right? we had her squared away buy 130p.... we lingered till 215 she had an orientation at 4p, Rick wanted to stay till after 3p but I thought she needed time to wander or just relax.... he was tense but decided we'd go......I hugged her by with last minute safety advice. and we left..... I love my husband but other than once a year on a cruise we haven't really been alone since we dated. I hope this new time in our marriage is or can be like we are dating again. with all this and my mom having health issues as well as 2 aunts and then my new job.... I am feeling anxious and ambivalent .......hence a bottle of wine... late night kitchen cleaning.... also I would like to add........ I knew I would miss those from River City.... but not this much I miss everyone.... the patients..... the coworkers..... I grew so much there .... I so want to go back.... I really really really do.... nothing is ever perfect.... sure i felt forced into my position of resignation..... but i miss it all....... I had time to do nursing.... I run so much and see so little of the patients on the night shift.... they are asleep rightly so.... but still...... Ive waxed on and on..... so many changes in this life.... I must have faith.... if I am suppose to be at River city the lord will humble me and those involved and a door will open..... or life will I don't know.... I just have faith that the next course of action will fall before. I have grown so much this year spiritually. I turn to prayer so freely now.....for others and myself. I get all turned around inside trying to define God or my higher power.... its there..... undefinable and I have faith.... I am open to the next chapter in my life. whatever is in my higher good I am ready..... that said please lord no deaths... and while I'm asking I could do with a few less health issues..... just saying.... your will be done.... but if you're listening .... I had to say..... God bless everyone.....
by Sandy Bell

August 21, 2015 at 01:11AM
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