I made it 56hrs off my medications. I would never tell a patient to do what I did. But I wanted to try. I take so much everyday. I just wanted to know what it felt like again to just be in my body. All the medicine I take effects me. My energy. My outlook. My drive. My ambition. And honestly my memory too. At 24th hour through the 40th. It was awesome. Energy. Clear mind. Active. Hadn't been there in a while. But I could feel it all lurking. Building. I can't walk right now. My legs are so bad. My feet are numb with that needle prickling. Every joint is cracking. My head is thumping hard. My ears are ringing. I received a spider bite on my thigh while being all energetic and cleaning. And in 12hr with antibiotics in my system before to buffer it. It's red swollen pitted. I've a rash across my low back radiating from the bite. My hearts beating so hard it's in my throat. AND YES FOLKS I remember I did it to myself. I ain't complaining. JS! Lol. It's one thing to know you take meds that you have to or life threatening complications will occur. But another to be brought to your knees so fast. I won't be repeating this experiment again. I'd rather take my meds like a good patient. And work an extra shift here and there to save for Lanie. My doctor is still gonna have to have a wake up call that I can't handle all her consults. Hehe. Alright this hard headed nurse has been taught a lesson now let's all learn from this people. TAKE YO DAMN MEDICINE!

I made it 56hrs off my medications. I would never tell a patient to do what I did. But I wanted to try. I take so much everyday. I just wanted to know what it felt like again to just be in my body. All the medicine I take effects me. My energy. My outlook. My drive. My ambition. And honestly my memory too. At 24th hour through the 40th. It was awesome. Energy. Clear mind. Active. Hadn't been there in a while. But I could feel it all lurking. Building. I can't walk right now. My legs are so bad. My feet are numb with that needle prickling. Every joint is cracking. My head is thumping hard. My ears are ringing. I received a spider bite on my thigh while being all energetic and cleaning. And in 12hr with antibiotics in my system before to buffer it. It's red swollen pitted. I've a rash across my low back radiating from the bite. My hearts beating so hard it's in my throat. AND YES FOLKS I remember I did it to myself. I ain't complaining. JS! Lol. It's one thing to know you take meds that you have to or life threatening complications will occur. But another to be brought to your knees so fast. I won't be repeating this experiment again. I'd rather take my meds like a good patient. And work an extra shift here and there to save for Lanie. My doctor is still gonna have to have a wake up call that I can't handle all her consults. Hehe. Alright this hard headed nurse has been taught a lesson now let's all learn from this people. TAKE YO DAMN MEDICINE!
by Sandy Bell

July 02, 2015 at 08:17AM
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Tonight's dinner: fresh herb roasted chicken in celery and onions, with onion sautéed fingerling potatoes with fresh dill, paprika, cayenne pepper with splat of sour cream. I hurt myself eating.

Tonight's dinner: fresh herb roasted chicken in celery and onions, with onion sautéed fingerling potatoes with fresh dill, paprika, cayenne pepper with splat of sour cream. I hurt myself eating.
by Sandy Bell

July 01, 2015 at 11:42PM
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I've had a few health issues this year. Well I always do but I've had new ones to deal with. I gained 20lbs on a new medicine Belsomra for sleep that was the only change band as is posted I was down into the 160's before that. So all the work over 3yrs gone. Even with 800 calorie diet I gained. But if Belsomra for 3 weeks and I've lost 6lbs. I'm going to announce a few next. I decided to stop taking all my medications. My heart pills. My blood pressure pills. My diabetic pills. My daily antibiotics. It's over 300$ a month most times near double. Several reasons. My doctor has planned 3 specialist consults. I've moaned about those expenses previously over 1500$ estimate so far out of pocket. I can't afford it. I have a daughter going to college and two grandkids. And I do like to actually spend some money on myself too. So in all honesty when I don't comply with that treatment plan which includes a cardiologist a stress test more mess and Neuro with mri's and more tests not to mention the sleep hormone study out of pocket. Well when I don't do that she won't want to be my doctor anymore even if it's because I can't afford it. So why wait to not have a doctor? I'll do it now. No more medicine. If I get sick I'll go to a doc in box take my chances. I've do delusions to what come next. Headaches out of control. Chest pain. Severe body pain. Muscle rigidity. Crippling joint pain. But I've learned to. Deal with a lot in my life. I can find a way to deal now. Besides the money I save on meds and copays will put my daughter through college for 3 years. I turned in my notice for full time at river city and offered to remain PRN. Whether that happens remains to be seen. But I will now be joining the USA group. It will be less pay. BUT NO OVERTIME. I'm so tired of working overtime every payday on a MANDITORY bases and still getting asked to do more on top of that. My job taught my to be compassionate and how to show it. My job helped me learn to connect with people better. I am thankful for that. But I felt the lords hand in my life opening new doors and I trust what comes next. There are people at that job I will never forget and love. I pray we continue to stay in touch. I maybe share to much on Facebook. The last year I've tired to be more reserved and private. Sometimes successful and other moments not so much. I am blessed. And hope each of you find comfort and know whether near or far I love you and I am sending you light and healing always

I've had a few health issues this year. Well I always do but I've had new ones to deal with. I gained 20lbs on a new medicine Belsomra for sleep that was the only change band as is posted I was down into the 160's before that. So all the work over 3yrs gone. Even with 800 calorie diet I gained. But if Belsomra for 3 weeks and I've lost 6lbs. I'm going to announce a few next. I decided to stop taking all my medications. My heart pills. My blood pressure pills. My diabetic pills. My daily antibiotics. It's over 300$ a month most times near double. Several reasons. My doctor has planned 3 specialist consults. I've moaned about those expenses previously over 1500$ estimate so far out of pocket. I can't afford it. I have a daughter going to college and two grandkids. And I do like to actually spend some money on myself too. So in all honesty when I don't comply with that treatment plan which includes a cardiologist a stress test more mess and Neuro with mri's and more tests not to mention the sleep hormone study out of pocket. Well when I don't do that she won't want to be my doctor anymore even if it's because I can't afford it. So why wait to not have a doctor? I'll do it now. No more medicine. If I get sick I'll go to a doc in box take my chances. I've do delusions to what come next. Headaches out of control. Chest pain. Severe body pain. Muscle rigidity. Crippling joint pain. But I've learned to. Deal with a lot in my life. I can find a way to deal now. Besides the money I save on meds and copays will put my daughter through college for 3 years. I turned in my notice for full time at river city and offered to remain PRN. Whether that happens remains to be seen. But I will now be joining the USA group. It will be less pay. BUT NO OVERTIME. I'm so tired of working overtime every payday on a MANDITORY bases and still getting asked to do more on top of that. My job taught my to be compassionate and how to show it. My job helped me learn to connect with people better. I am thankful for that. But I felt the lords hand in my life opening new doors and I trust what comes next. There are people at that job I will never forget and love. I pray we continue to stay in touch. I maybe share to much on Facebook. The last year I've tired to be more reserved and private. Sometimes successful and other moments not so much. I am blessed. And hope each of you find comfort and know whether near or far I love you and I am sending you light and healing always
by Sandy Bell

July 01, 2015 at 09:59PM
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Not meaning this petty. I'm going to make a lot of people very happy soon. People who have been nice to my face but really don't like me. That's life though. I appreciate the pretence. We all have to do this. Make nice to have a community. To socially have peace. And you see how "well" that works out by listening to the news. PLS pray for me. I'm doing the best I can in this life. I'm so tired of feeling like a failure.

Not meaning this petty. I'm going to make a lot of people very happy soon. People who have been nice to my face but really don't like me. That's life though. I appreciate the pretence. We all have to do this. Make nice to have a community. To socially have peace. And you see how "well" that works out by listening to the news. PLS pray for me. I'm doing the best I can in this life. I'm so tired of feeling like a failure.
by Sandy Bell

July 01, 2015 at 08:44AM
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Things are changing for me in a way didn't plan. Part of it make me feel bad. Makes me feel like I broke my word. But we are allowed right? For the right reason. I have so much love for people in my life. I feel guilt and remorse but hope.

Things are changing for me in a way didn't plan. Part of it make me feel bad. Makes me feel like I broke my word. But we are allowed right? For the right reason. I have so much love for people in my life. I feel guilt and remorse but hope.
by Sandy Bell

June 30, 2015 at 01:41PM
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